Molly

Ave Maria :-)

There will be girlfriends and then there Will Be Girlfriends. I am sleepy... tempted to take a nap..but so feel led to share with you a particular blessing...re: my girlfriend.

She is well ....betcha by golly wow...not just a regular friend ....but my first cousin as well.

It's the birthday of dear good ole Molly, Mahl to us and her family/friends.

Her mom and my dad both deceased brother and sister..well that doesn't guarantee , that cousins will get to like, love each other... but in our case...that was the particular blessing.

To make this even more unbelievalble... she has 3 other sisters ...all whom I love dearly and relate / bond/connect on different levels. 

As we grow older...yah, yah ..ako iyon hahahaha..we realize God sends us friends -- of assorted temperaments...  if they were colors ...ALL COLORS then.

Because there is no single friend who can satisfy all our needs, except perhaps Christ...and then well that is a different level

So Moll is second eldest girl .... Maritess being eldest ...then there's Veny and the bunso Emy...The brothers are Ramon (deceased)  Roy and Benjie.  All of them sweet and absolute darlings.

Back to Moll.

She and I bonded , cemented an otherwise fragile relationship when she stayed with us at Sanville.... this was probably longest stay of Moll with us...over a year. This was also the time..we were both at our craziest. I was so gung-ho with the musikera /banda way of life.... and my beloved cousin..her brother too..Monching supported me to the utmost.

I'd be a liar if I say we did not enjoy that period....because God knows we did... we also went overboard..and twas by God's graces that we did not end up living  a fool's life. Our parents meantime, bless their big,big hearts allowed us to stretch our wings and fly to uncharted ...possibly dangerous paths ---- mahirap pigilan the young and the restless.

What was it that consumed us then? Music, music and then more music.

Couldn't believe my lucky stars when I passed audition as vocalist for a band then playing at Phil Plaza.

The band leader was Sir Boy Baria, I wonder if he is still around... but what a talent..almost half-crazy in his genius .... and the band's music was into jazz...fusion jazz was conquering the radio then ...we played 6 nites a week ...and there was a time pati Sunday we played ..It was so crazy..'would be running a fever...my nodules so inflamed from all the singing and puyat ...but we were so , so deliriously happy -fulfilled even.  Monch was our bodyguard cum driver...  tho' gentle as a lamb --- buti wala kaming away na napasok...and then Molly accompanied me thru all the gigs ..we went as far as Baguio..stayed there for weeks .... to rehearse new repertoire, getting ready for gigs in Manila.

It's amazing when you share an episode in life so very dear to you..and you build memories with someone... night after night ...we were so drunk..not with liquor but with music, friendship, youth .... the music we loved then ...it is even more lethal than any drug or alcohol , tell you.

Before this jazz band... 'was with another band... but was not really into their kind of disco/rock music ...it was with Best of Friends ..that  was able to sing heart, lungs and guts out. What is it with the young? We zoom in on a point..and Then We Want To Prove our Point as tho that was the only thing that mattered.

And yes needless to say..why oh why do we want to learn the harrrddd way..hahaha.

To give up a way of life that consumed you is something will never be able to figure out...perhaps I found a deeper passion...perhaps a greater cause...  I did not tire of it ... gave it up at the peak of my passion for music and a musical career..but  life is like that...there is an inner voice in us ... no matter how hard we try to be deaf ...bungul-bungol ba... the Voice gets to you and clearly gives a message...shows us Direction.

Molly..my love.... our faces are a bit wrinkled now... our hair turning grey/white faster by the minute ...  our hearts worn-out by too much loving and forgiving...but hey...God did give us hearts that would  be able to stand the test of time.

 You are my sister and I love you dearly and I'm sorry when  I am not always there for you.... but I believe you are tons braver than me... you are a warrior.... but please at this point and time...may your weapons be the sword of light and love... You will always be our Molly singing Cabaret with that cute swagger -- Liza Minelli would be put to shame haha... and next to Tia Dinday ..you own the most spectacular smile... Molly in blue with Laura Jean

We go thru what we go thru well because , and we have to take His Word for that..because we will come out the better  for it. Everyone loves you..but Jesus and Mary love you the most. Happy birthday.... tightest hugs ever...dil and josh send their love.................................  mye

No More Tears

Ave Maria:-)

It's the season of burol --- Filipino term for funeral wakes -- here in Manila had to attend 3...and then on the family front, right after a joyous reunion... we had to part with a young male cousin - Gani or Gunsmoke - his nickname ( he  couldn't attend said reunion ) ...and then a few days later his ailing mom, Auntie Fe also died. Poor Rafael and other members of the immediate family were on their  way to attend Gani's burial, they recieved the sad news that  Mama Fe was also gone. 

No matter how as Catholics..we believe and always bravely say that physical death is not a permanent good-bye but that it leads to the Eternal Life with Christ , yet  the human beings we are, with our faith as yet imperfect - we are greatly affected by the  seeming loss. There is grief, at times  the bereaved are inconsolable , fear and anxiety can also seep in especially if the one who died is a breadwinner or a rock   for the family....  when pain is so deep and the death is unexpected...anger is not an alien emotion. And we never quite know whom to vent the anger to -- to God...? to the departed loved one , as tho' he/she could help it..? or can we be angry at ourself --the ones left behind ...? anger is probably just another by-product of the pain and fear of what lies ahead for the ones bereaved.

Of the 12 brothers and sisters, we are blest that 5 remain to be guardians of a burning faith in God  and family love.. of core values painstaykingly passed on from generation to generation . the family is not without its warts , there are colossal weaknesses, faults and failings only God can heal and forgive ... but reliance on God's love sees us thru... perhaps the warts are our feeble excuse to recieve God's mercy and deliverance, after all did not Jesus Himself say that He came for sinners?

Our aunts and uncle are in their late seventies, perhaps the bodies are weaker, the hairlines receding.. the gait slower .. but in my heart I know the spirit remains vibrant and full of love. Always full of love.Thanks be to God.

Bear with my reminiscing .. it is because Tia Fe's passage reminds me of peculiar traits that run particularly among  the female siblings :

--- when they find the love of their life -- soul mate if you wish to call it --- they love fiercely, stand by their man thru thick and thin.... and I mean thru thickest and thinnest.

--- all of them have this certain way of playing sweet and coy .... really when they make lambing , you'd almost be embarrassed kay OA gyud kaayo oi hahahaha..... 

But don't let this lambing mode fool you into thinking it's all just fluff and no substance because like I said ..they will  fight for their love no matter what.

It's also a love that chooses to grow beyond romantic...beyond convenience ....  thru the years matrimonial grace seeps thru ......

--- so whether this be dear departed Tia Fe or Tia Eddie .... or dear Tia Dinday in  the U.S. or Tia  Litang , you will hear the familiar strain -- we have a Visayan term  for it -- iyat -- I don't think it has an  exact English translation... it is like flirty but  harmless..and the men are weak before such female  power hahaha. 

--- be it the male brothers or females -- everyone is blest with a healthy sense of  humor --- in their  times there was no need for off-color , green jokes -- the jokes  were more of wholesome pranks really   it was the type of humor that could lift  one's  burden ..and make you feel hopeful again ...surely that is   a God-given gift  -- it can only come from  innate joy ... a fruit of the Holy Spirit.  

--- makes me realize , one does not become joyful all of a sudden ..the joy has to  have a source ..and  now I know it springs from our grandparents Ramon and  Filomena thru whose hearts God  channeled his love.

--- I love how they, the brothers and sisters  loved each other . It makes me believe in God all the more. I love how they are not blind to each others faults but will try best to help a sibling rise above human weakness.

--- most of all I thank God that these gifts are not lost... that in our generation and God-willing  in the next.... there is the passing on of priceless inheritance....indeed the best gifts are the ones that are invisible to the human eye. 

In the last family reunion the 4th generation had an opportunity to get to know each other more and bonded .

... but there is a depth that they need to discover --they think it is just because of biological reasons that they like and love each other --- but really it is more than DNA -- and even a group of persons not related by blood  can experience this love --- we just need Jesus ...only Jesus. 

Tia Fe found her Totoy ....her husband with whom she raised 11 children (!) What a feat... Theirs was a colorful , dramatic marriage --- Tio Totoy in his heydey was almost moviestar handsome with the macho bravado to match his action star looks ... then they say Tia Fe looked like a doll in her youth... very pretty...I can't say she was the most beautiful as my other aunts will probaby read this and kill me if I write that hahahaha.

God is so good. He shared with us the gift of life. He gave us enough brains, a heart, a body , talents, abilities, treasure...time and opportunities to figure out what to do with this God-given  life.  Let us pray that before old age or failing health  catches up with us , we soon understand the purpose of this life. Our life is not simply for us to live  --- but it is a life lent to us so that in our own unique way we can impart the love of GOD - tell others God loved us so much   and draw others to this God who awaits us all in heaven.

It's when loved ones die that I am  all the more grateful , relieved that Jesus was sent to save us... I can' think of any single person  who died who was without sin ---   everyone  failed God and man in some way so  Jesus  is the One Who brokers for us God's complete forgiveness... and  thru Jesus we are assured of seeing , being with our departed loved ones in a place where there are no more tears. 

Dearest Gani and Tia Fe..thank you for all the love...the patience..the forgiveness you both silently gave us.... no more tears... no more tears ..Be Perfectly Happy Forever.
                

........................................ Meanwhile you and me still have to log our hours .... until the Boss says He wants to see us. Come...Let us walk hand in hand , journeying in faith... keeping Jesus ever before us. Good nite..... lovelots, te mye

The Painting in the Sky

Ave Maria :-) 

One late afternoon...well close to dusk really... had opportunity to pray outside... ours is a tiny village probably 5 streets... it's quiet, no jeeps buses no blaring horns...occasionally there will be someone with a tv or radio played on high volume.. but that day..maybe becoz it had just showered - it was quiet --- i love it when it's quiet... then you can pray the rosary and walk at the same time ... tried to get into the groove of prayer except that my eyes always got drawn to the sky above. I rushed to the home but was a bit  late to bring out the camera .... wish I had done it 5 minutes earlier.. the sun would set soon...and the cloud formations changed so fast.

We always see the sky ... but never quite pay attention to the beautiful painting that it is. That late afternoon God had prepared a treat for me... was so unprepared for it. I am not a fan of dusk -- it often strikes me as a bit sad.... subdued and then before you know it it's plain dark.... I dislike grey colors in the sky -- well even on clothes... or things... I like colors with color , you know what I mean? But that time... it was like a slideshow of live paintings.... I was walking... praying .... slowly noticed the pretty sky above... it was the most delicate cloud formations with the most----- I'm sorry I'm at a loss for words.... there must have been at least 12 shades of grey ...because some clouds had a bit of rain... and then the sunlight filtered ... it wanted to play peek-a-boo with the clouds.... the sun was soon bidding adieu so even its rays had different shades from bright orange to the palest pinks...

. every minute or so when you looked up ...it was a different painting, the wind blew..the clouds were like dancing to a soft waltz.... the light was just gorgeous.... I should really get a better camera...I had to make do with my ..5 ..8pixel something  cam fon//// most of the spectacular images are stored in my brain and not on some sd memory card...

. after I rushed home to get the camfon.... had to literally run outside... so funny...running after the sky.... trying to get that shot ....reached the exit of our village becoz was so frustrated with all those telephone lines blocking the view...

You'll have to take my word  for the stark beauty my eyes feasted on.... well...here is your good news... you could probably have a better view right where you are... Perhaps God will paint a picture for you in the morning --- come outside..... take a walk...breathe th air..hope it's not so polluted.... say a little prayer ... it sure paves the way for the Master Painter's free slideshow.... you will be the only audience , and it makes us feel so special.... imagine God going out of His way to show you real beauty..and it's all yours. Alleluia!

I'll try to post some fotos...your imagination will have to add what my foncam couldn't capture.... God created so much beauty and we are His most Breathtaking beautiful creation of all. 

If I get to see New Zealand  or Tibet or the Scandinavian countryside...will probably suffer a stroke from the sheer bliss of it all... And this is just planet earth....What then could heaven look like. ..? God bless you...God bless us all.... and God bless all of his magnificent creation ....te mye 

People Who Need People

Ave Maria:-)

Has it been 2 weeks since the family reunion... here is an honest confession ..whether it was our family reunion in Cebu...a dear friend's 60th birthday...a recent parish youth Life in the Spirit formation seminar... or just plain staying at home , having a relaxed day with Tatay , Lola Lina ...Josh .... teasing each other...doing things together when the situation or chore permits .... it was... each and every incident ..an opportunity to experience God's mighty and abundant love.... His caress..his persistence... his protection..his affirmation... his healing..his Divine Providence coming thru either gentle raindrops or a powerful outpouring ...torrents of blessing drenching us..filling us.. building to our wholeness.

Marissa my 1st cousin is leaving tomorrow... then a few days later her mom, siblings, son, nephews nieces will also return to the U.S.

At Cebu meanwhile... tho most of us had already left ..there still are a few lingering on...Roy and his family --- his presence has inspired other male cousins to go visit another cousin in Dumaguete...perhaps an overnite visit, pahabol mini-reunion , it has also happened to the Manila contingent here  --- this makes me smile .... hahaha.... they have not yet had their fill of bonding.

On the surface perhaps most will think...well gee whiz....this is the coolest thing ever... we're blood relatives and we so get along and love each other inspite of ourselves. Hep, hep..hep ...lest you think that this joy can only be produced by a wonderful family gathering please please let me joyously share with you this reflection : That this same joy can be replicated many times over...and it need not be triggered only by presence of loved ones... but even happen with complete strangers.

Now you think I'm really cuckoo... but I am not... or if this be cuckoo... then may it be like this for me till I cross-over to the next life hahaha...

Whether you agree with me or not dear friend  .... it is God's real presence ... how He mysteriously reaches out to us.. gives palpable joy and sincerity, truth and love to our gatherings ---- it is Him...it is Jesus, yesterday , today and forever.

Only thing is...we haven't really quite gotten the hang of it.

We smugly think we have been happy and fulfilled because we did the planning...or certain people we like and love were present ... or becoz all the elements were purrfect like the weather, the food... da,da,da.....we list all the reasons that make an occasion a Definite 'Success'..... list/name all reasons except GOD - The Main Reason ... yes, it can be so.

Barbra Streisand sang People who need people ..are the luckiest people in the world .... at the reunion... at the 60th bday party of my friend...at the youth formation seminar in church...or at home with my very small family -- Barbra's song could be the theme song. In all of those occasions -- people just reached out to others in trust and in love --- experiencing belongingness... acceptance...respect...perhaps forgiveness too.

Barbra's voice soars and she sings : And yet letting our grown-up pride..hide all the need inside..acting more like children..than children -- Lovers they're very special people .... what a spectacular song...

Lovers need not be limited to romantic lovers .... at the youth formation seminar...youths who really met most participants for the first time experienced something special ( as tho they made new friends with the possibility of becoming true friends) .... at my friend's birthday party held so simply but sweetly -- just a small gathering of those closest to her , who journeyed with her -- it was special.No Shangrila, Ritzy hotel... but joy and sweetness permeated the air... my friend is a gem of a person ..a mother figure and those who greeted her that night expressed their gratitude and love both to her and to God.

at home, whenever peace and God's love reigns  -- it is priceless.

at the family reunion in Dalaguete, Cebu and even the spill-over mini-reunions in smaller groups -- you could cry for joy ...

Many times relatives would blurt out ...I love my family...family.... family -- but really dear ones -- it was more than mere blood and DNA connecting.

It is God who shows us His face , allows us to experience his love and presence thru each other.

God shows, reveals to us bits and pieces of Him..His goodness and beauty shining thru each one of us --

Sharing with you a few more fotos .... when we remember who we truly are: Man created in the image and likeness of God, redeemed by Christ His Only Begotten Son -- it is impossible not to exude and share God's goodness and love -- it will come out so very naturally out of our pores and we need not even try hard. It just happens because we are who we truly are...

in Christ.

To loved ones who are already planning the next reunion...may we include always Jesus in the Guest List and we can be certain our joy will be complete.

God bless all.....te mye

Roots

Ave Maria:-)

Plans..plans..plans... oh how we make our plans and set our goals and try to get everything organized ..ever conscious of that famous timetable... sometimes we make it..other times we fall short... or hey..something better happens, something that never even crossed our minds.

For 2014... on my father's side of the biological tree... last week-end of June was targetted as the Reunion Date for the Garces -Gaviola clan -- our Adam and Eve would be Lolo Ramon Sr. and then the invincible Lola/ Nanay Feling...Filomena.

My late mother Mama Lydia made sure early in my youth to get acquainted with the bigger family. I am a Manila girl...  my spare parts : from  beloved Leyte of the Bardillon family and then from Bohol , my father Ramon Jr.'s province --- On my mother's side they were only 3 siblings , and one sister died during the war...so I have 3 cousins from Tita Moni : Tessie, Lottie (both deceased) and Mano Boy ... thank God they have children..tho I have lost contact with others but pray God gives me time to re-connect with them.

Now on my father's side : Good Lord ...Lolo and Lola were blest with 12 (!) children.... in the olden days..it was considered small family if you only had 5 children ..those were the days when Filipino families would have 9,10... dozen children.... those were also the days when inspite of the big size and number of mouths to feed.....everyone grew up hale and healthy, there was enough food on the table..and children could get good education, even if it was public school -- it was a high standard  of education...Best for me to stay off that topic.

So from my very tiny turf in Manila...childhood years would be filled with sweet memories of family reunions.

Lolo Amon and Nanay Feling hosted a lot of these when they were alive -- well maybe it shouldn't be termed a reunion since these were the original twelve Injuns haha ... but they planted a precious seed of love, faith in God and unity --at all costs. Except for Mariano, the 2nd son who became a priest and bishop ...everyone married and had children -- so the family grew ....

From any of the 12 we would love to hear stories of their happy childhood years...living in Bahay Daku .... Lola the disciplinarian and Lolo the gentleman -- he was a colonel... their stories could fill volumes of books -- but the values and memories stored in their hearts by their parents fueled them when it was their turn to become mothers and fathers.

Like all families they had their ups and downs, good and not-so-good side ... quarrels , misunderstandings, growing up pains even if already very much adults hehe -- but always and always , somehow love and belief in each other prevailed.  I know in my heart it was faith and love for GOD that helped kept the family together and survive all crisis and come out even better as persons.

Tia Litang , during this 2014 reunion in Cebu reminisced about the war years, when everyone was holed up in Cagting , the family farm... how do you exist in the middle of a brutal war and be so incredibly happy -- they had enough food, Tia Litang says they were more than 50 relatives hiding there.. they would enjoy simple birthday celebrations -- her eyes lighting up at those happy memories... she wanted to sing for us the compositions of Monsignour, funny silly sweet songs ...I hope Menchie or Monet can video her kay wa sya ka kanta ini sa reunion. 

Well.... I'll have to fast forward to June 2014 ---- as this month was approaching..those planning in Cebu were getting apprehensive ... how do we make it happen? Poor Tess always saying plaintively :" Sus kun buhi pa si Monsignour and Tio Danny, di gyud ta magka probema." Because yes... when Lolo and Lola passed away Danny and Monsignour  took over as family patriarchs ... they were focal points , rocks of gibraltar ... they were  our anchors then and the clan gravitated towards them... Later on Tio Nino took over....  and now it is Tio Alex's ..please let no one forget this...
So Tess was understandably worried but.......
  

Oh my everdearest TESS...now you now that Lolo Amon and Lola Feling and Mons and Daddy, Tia Remy , Tio Nino and all dearly departed live on in each and everyone of us. With so many praying both in heaven and on earth.. how could we not pull through?  Pledges and commitments came pouring in.... some of the younger generation saved money from their allowance or earnings --- at then end when dear EMY our in-house fab events coordinator was counting payments for Dakong Bato -- it would seem as tho everyone was abe to pay ... so other pledges could be used for food etc..... Praise the Lord!

Fresh from this reunion , I survived flu and asthma and actually came home feeling much better... strange, strange, strange indeed...( please please Jesus no sick call during a reunion please, please) Well Jesus knows what is best He gave me and everyone present there what He deemed was enough and what was best for us ---- Dakong Bato has no long stretches of white sand --- there was a pool and then right away the deep sea --- becoz if there was a long white beach -- nah ! you wouldn't be able to get hold of the youth --- hahaha...as it was we were in  a way wonderfully imprisoned --- there were no visitors during the 2 days we were there...so twas as if we had the resort all to ourselves .... the other guests arrived on the day we left...alleluia!
Marissa in her Californian accent: "Rich ahhnnnd fay-mouz .....!" hahahaha..... libre ang panaginip.

 
.. I just recall during those days in Dakong Bato..then our last day at Cebu city just hanging out at Ayala mall ...listening to Bunjings silly stories.. listening to their laughter..... my cousins Tess, Veny Monet Dolly Molly's lovely faces - ga lingkod lang mi at Kentucky .... I treasured the sight and sound and feel of them - Roy made it to the reunion btw  , so I saved it all ...stored it in my heart.... Kristiana , Boting's youngest daughter and I holding hands at Ayala mall ...she was soaking it all in ...she got so healed....then she said : "I love Cebu... I love it here....we don't have it like this ..... the family and all ....."

 I just listened.. I could have been a fattened cow and slaughtered later and could not care less ...hahaha.

Lots of our loved ones have passed away ... so I know this is reality---- I will not always see the faces I see now , nor always enjoy their company... but I know for sure that they are there for me and I am there for them ...but it is all just a foretaste of what we will eventually experience in heaven... That's 100% comforting to know our grandest reunion will be in heaven. My goodness.... hahaha wa man ko ka istorya bahin sa reunion.... ah cgue part one lang ni ha?

selfie with niece Vianney:-)

Wanna thank Mark and Tita Nelly becoz they kindly invited my nephew Paolo and his sons who survived Yolanda ...then also Pamela , Pao and Pam nephew/niece from Mama Lydia's side and her 2 sons too to the Family Dinner they hosted at Garnetville. So I was with Gaviolas and then be with Paolo and Pamela and my apos...whom I met for the first time.... God is so good and worthy to be praised.